broken hallelujah
36" x 24" / acrylic on canvas / sold
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You will paint yourself as you are. You must first allow yourself to see the true you in your entirety. Begin where you are at. Reveal the naked truth. Allow yourself to see. Allow yourself to accept. Allow yourself to embrace. There will be no skipping of steps in this process. It is a journey… …self realization. Do you seek the power of knowing your self by discovering your gifts and your challenges? Do you desire the ability to accept All without denying emotion or thought. Seek your truth. |
Broken Hallelujah
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At night, lying in bed, the painting began to take form. Deep greens mixed and blended with gold. These colors would hold the background. As I painted, I was determined to break the cycle.
Just as the layers had surrounded my body and being, I found myself placing layer upon layer on the canvas. Molding paste was sculpted and formed to create the shape and texture of my body. The molded form lifting off the canvas and carrying the texture of a mountainside. The texture of a skin that was so strong and yet so delicate and fragile. The tone and color of the skin was next. Shadow and light dancing across the valleys, folds, mounds. I am the Earth. I have a legacy that is rich in beauty and in grief.
The next layer was that of a fine copper, covering the entire form of the body…my body. Adornment, protection, a connection to the divine. Even as I moved the copper over the layers of skin, I knew that not even this layer would remain completely intact. Using sandpaper, I removed part of this armor as well, revealing the original molding paste that resided underneath. I experienced an emotion so deep and old, that at first it moved like liquid rust. I cried until the water ran clear and moved easily from deep inside my body to the outside world. This hurt is no longer mine to hold.
As I painted I leaned in toward the canvas, my lips resting upon the folds and lines of my flesh. Even my skin tells the Story of the Borderlands. My skin bears witness to the roads and maps that are created when one walks in more than one world. Somewhere within that map is the road that leads to the magnificence of my human spirit, which lies awaiting the joy of discovery.
I am willing to see and walk these roads.
Just as the layers had surrounded my body and being, I found myself placing layer upon layer on the canvas. Molding paste was sculpted and formed to create the shape and texture of my body. The molded form lifting off the canvas and carrying the texture of a mountainside. The texture of a skin that was so strong and yet so delicate and fragile. The tone and color of the skin was next. Shadow and light dancing across the valleys, folds, mounds. I am the Earth. I have a legacy that is rich in beauty and in grief.
The next layer was that of a fine copper, covering the entire form of the body…my body. Adornment, protection, a connection to the divine. Even as I moved the copper over the layers of skin, I knew that not even this layer would remain completely intact. Using sandpaper, I removed part of this armor as well, revealing the original molding paste that resided underneath. I experienced an emotion so deep and old, that at first it moved like liquid rust. I cried until the water ran clear and moved easily from deep inside my body to the outside world. This hurt is no longer mine to hold.
As I painted I leaned in toward the canvas, my lips resting upon the folds and lines of my flesh. Even my skin tells the Story of the Borderlands. My skin bears witness to the roads and maps that are created when one walks in more than one world. Somewhere within that map is the road that leads to the magnificence of my human spirit, which lies awaiting the joy of discovery.
I am willing to see and walk these roads.
